Deer Camp Blog

Deer Camp Blog- the outdoor column of The Bodock Times- (a satirical periodical) Humor and Hunting at the famous Christmas Place Plantation Hunting Club on the edge of the Mississippi Delta

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Friday, February 20, 2009

Carbon Credit Focus

Gusher,MS> Not everyone has an oil well coming up through their floor like that zillionaire at Othmar Outdoors. Hell, he even has his own newsletter now. Not all of us work for a world wide conglomerate that pays their bloggers hundreds of thousands of dollars a year like Kristine. Some of us are scrambling every day to figure out a way to make a living. Old Scratch has been doing the research and we think Carbon Credits are the wave of the future, and the future is now.
The most important thing to know about Carbon Credits are that they are imaginary. Yes, imaginary, and they basically are what someone with a guilty conscience will pay to feel like they are offsetting the amount of pollution they are creating. They take their private jet to Europe to meet with the ultra rich like the Bushwacker, Drew or James Marchington to relax and party. They rent limos, throw wild parties etc., etc. Trust me, there is always plenty of Boobies and Beer. Then have someone figure up how many tons of pollution to the air they have caused and then pay for Carbon Credits to offset what they have done. Very simple.
Now Old Scratch and I figure that between our properties we have about 1600 acres that fits into the program.(or what we are willing to put up) for this.
Just using a base price (according to rough estimates) we think that each acre in the system is worth $250. $250 x 1600= $400,000.
Now this is great but being greedy and wanting to help the environment we would like to go directly to the hollywood elite and sell each acre on a yearly basis at $200 per acre. We need a rich California salesman in that Hollywood circle that can sell a wild hog to a starlet and make them think they got a deal. Looks like a win, win situation. So if you know a rich guilty Corporate owner or Hollywood type let me know.
Will send pics of our beautiful timberland if required.

5 Comments:

At 11:02 AM, Blogger Rod McBellanic said...

We all can't be Othmar. Let me know how this works out for you. Gotta get creative nowadays!
Also, thanks alot for all your help. Really appreciate it, however, the colored girls go...doo, dadoo, doo, doo, dadoo

Rod "Chad"
Field Dress
The Wild Side Blog

 
At 4:17 PM, Blogger Kristine said...

Oh, I wish I was making hundreds of thousands a year. That would be cool.

 
At 7:10 AM, Blogger Dennis A Carroll said...

I have a lot of black stuff on the inside of my fireplace. Will that count as Carbon Credits?

 
At 11:51 AM, Blogger Libby Spencer said...

I don't know nothing 'bout no carbon credits.

I'm just making the rounds at long last. Hope you've been well.

 
At 7:26 PM, Blogger Othmar Vohringer said...

Hey Editor you can have my oil well if you want, I even pay for the shipping. Wife said she is sick and tired of it mudding up her garden. :) Thanks for the links.
-ov-

 

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