Tuesday, September 27, 2011

How To Drive a Rich Lawyer Crazy


When dealing with my evil brothers, I am usually at the bottom of the totem pole. I bide my time, because what comes around, goes around. I finally had my chance the other day when I casually mentioned to Paul (Beezlebub) that my buddy Mark (Mailrider) and I were trying to swap our hill land in Yalobusha county for a big piece of bottom land along the river. This got his attention and the trap was set.
One thing you need to know about rich lawyers is their weak spot. Their weak spot is DUCKS. There is something about duck hunting that gets under their skin and they will do anything for a great duck hunt.
His eyes lit up. "Are there any ducks on the property?" Satan asked.
I replied "Hell yeah, the damn things are all over it. It's filled with big sloughs and water holes right there on the main flyway to the lake." He almost had a coronary.
Of course, I have no idea if there is a duck within a hundred miles of there. I haven't even seen it.
"You know I might be interested in leasing the duck hunting on that land."
We haggled back and forth until we got a good number for the lease and then he started talking about duck hunting and shooting big deer.
I reminded him at the end that the lease was for ducks only. A new price would be needed if he wanted to shoot deer and of course I told him about all the giant rubs I had seen.
Wait 'till I go look at it and start feeding him bull about the 40 gazillion ducks I see.