Who Knew I Was Lady Madonna?
Deer Camp Blog- the outdoor column of The Bodock Times- (a satirical periodical) Humor and Hunting at the famous Christmas Place Plantation Hunting Club on the edge of the Mississippi Delta
The 6th Annual Hog Hunt at the famous Christmas Place was this past weekend and even though no one was killed, gored, or eaten we had a great time. My cousin Davin finally got a hog!
The Christmas Place Annual Hog Hunt is set for Feb27-March1. Please check with your local doctor or psychiatrist on what to do if you are gored by a wild hog. There Will Be Blood! Last man alive wins!
This is it, the last possible day of deer season. Saturday is the last day and everyone is sick and tired and ready to do something else. Everyone that is, except for my brothers , Satan and Lucifer. They are Good To Go! Nevermind that most of the bucks have dropped their antlers, their wives are sitting in divorce court waiting on a ruling and their children call the milkman Dad. Paul and Trent are heading to camp come hell or high water. Good Luck to them but I've had all I want, it is time to take care of a few things around the old homestead.
I know you all say that my poor brother Lucifer just doesn't have enough time to hunt and it's a real shame. I stay awake worrying about it. This year he has hunted very hard and here at the tail end of the season he finally got a nice big buck. I'm very proud that he kept fighting through to get him even after what a hard and long year it's been. Plus it is a great buck. Maybe he can help me get mine the last weekend. Congratulations Trent!
All Marian has really wanted to do for the last 4 or 5 years is get a hog, but never got the chance. This past weekend she visited us at the famous Christmas Place and finally connected on a big 180 lb. hog at 100 yards and dropped the big sow in her tracks. It was a really good shot and she was the happiest huntress in the woods. Here is a pic of her and the big hog and a big, big congratulations to her!
It has been a bad year, and an even worse deer season for me. I feel like I have been hunting on some lonely god-forsaken spot on the backside of Mordor while my evil brother Sauron (Paul) laughs at me. Thank God it is almost over.
A classic setting at the Yalobusha Country Club on New Years Eve as Joe "Lightfoot" Black danced his way into every woman's heart with his light Fred Astair dance movements. Trent "Bumblehoof"
Mark Stewart hasn't hunted very much this year, but this weekend he came down with the Tennessee contingent of Clint and Brandon to get after the deer.
Yes, the phone did ring and Satan himself was on the other end when I answered. "Hello," I managed and the voice said "Mule On The Pole!, muleonthepole muleonthepole, muleonthepole, muleonthepole, blah, blah, blah. He proceeded to tell of his unbelievable and legendary deer hunting skills and how he shot the 190 lb. 11-point on the Box Field stand, and mentioned that Michael got a coyote.
Paul and Michael have the whole Christmas Place to themselves for the next couple of days while Trent and I are here in Water Valley working and trying to earn a damn living. Tick, tick, tick, we are waiting on the phone to ring with some god-awful story of a giant mule that Paul has blasted. Worked all morning, tick, tick, tick. Now it is mid-afternoon, tick, tick, tick. Time keeps easing on by with no phone calls yet. I swear I am going up that lake one more time and blast the hell out of that big buck up there. The Peach Bowl is tomorrow at 11:30 AM. tick, tick, tick but I am heading South on New Years Day to start my year off right with a big buck. tick, tick, tick Don't think I could stand it if the phone rings. tick, tick, tick
While I was up here working like a dog, the rest of the members of the famous Christmas Place were at the camp hunting, drinking, and texting me all kind of crap. Burney slipped out and hunted the stand I had wanted to hunt. DAMN! He hunted the #1 field and late in the afternoon this big buck came bursting out chasing 4 does. Right Under Him. DAMN! He wasted no time and this super nice 185lb. 8-point with an 18 inch spread was his. DAMN!
My evil brother, no Paul, shot this fine deer last weekend as he snatched the rifle out of his wife's hand when it walked out into an open field at the famous Christmas Place. He had taken her hunting to maybe shoot a doe when this buck walked out. Paul said "Wanda there's a big buck, hand me the rifle." She started to aim and said "I see it." Paul said "You'll miss, give me the rifle! She said "I'm going to shoot him" He grabbed for the rifle and all hell broke loose in the stand. A terrible fight started as he tried to wrestle the gun away from her, the stand was shaking, screams and curses filled the air as he finally got her to the floor and snatched the gun away. The poor deer was only 50 yards away minding it's own business and wondering what the hell all the commotion was as Paul came up with the rifle and started blasting away. Ah, Paul has this nice 190 lb. 8-point on the pole to start the 2014 season but is sleeping with one eye open as Wanda plots her revenge.
It is once again Deer Eve in Mississippi and outside my office I can hear the distant sounds of people sighting-in their rifles at the last minute. I am at work but my mind is far away thinking about the big buck that I know is slipping through the woods waiting on me. We are headed to camp at Noon and hope to have the camp open and everything ready to go before dark. Tonight there will be a nice fire to talk old stories around, a few drinks after a long wait, fresh crappie for dinner, and a whole lot of anticipation for daylight to come.
Deer season is upon us and the first muzzle-loading season is now open. We are heading to camp tomorrow for the first weekend of the season in hopes of thinning the doe herd. It will be strange without Dad but we hope to have a good time and get a bunch of deer removed and hopefully some hogs too. Will try to keep Paul the Terrible and Trent the Grouchy under control. I'll give a report as soon as possible after the weekend.
This past weekend was the Big Work Weekend to get all the stands and fields finished before gun season rolls around. My brother, Satan, had his typical work weekend and got a big hog while the rest of us worked. To make matters worse, he left us short-handed and took his evil twin out bow hunting and Terry got this nice doe with his bow.
It was a good sized crowd that came down for Squirrel Camp and to honor my Dad. The only problem was that squirrels were few and far between. Another was that almost everyone stayed in camp Saturday afternoon to watch both Ole Miss and Miss State play football. That part ended great for everyone. I also thought it strange that everyone that went hunting said they needed to carry a shovel, I wonder why?
(Oxford,MS) Intercepted in the Endzone!!!!!! We watched the big screen on the review and the crowd went crazy when Senquez Golson got his foot down on the interception that sealed the win for the Ole Miss Rebels. Two plays later the game was over and the victory was ours. The sold out crowd went absolutely ape-shit crazy. People screamed and shouted, they clapped and sang, they threw their shoes in the air, I saw grown women and men crying, there was drinking and partying in the stands and hugs and Hotty-Toddy's to everyone around us. On the field a human sea of people rushed back and forth hugging and screaming, back-slapping and thanking the players and coaches. The goalpost came down and I don't know how many babies were conceived right there on the turf. It was the wildest thing I have ever seen or been part of, and the party hadn't even started.
By the time Denise and I got to the Grove Saturday, Paul and 50,000 of my closest friends were already raising hell. It was standing room only and you could tell something special was in the air. I received a toddy for breakfast found my brother James and just watched the sea of humanity boil in front of me. Paul was in winning form and proceeded to tell anyone that would listen that we were about the kick the crap out of BAMA. My cousin Kent made his was through the crowd and shook hands and we talked about how wild it was and then Paul said "You know, today is Dad's birthday, and I talked to him last night and he and I are gonna take care of Alabama today." Kent said "Really, today's Uncle Hershey's Birthday? Paul said "yea" He said "Let's drink a toast to him, and we 4 each had a shot of straight Ezra Brooks when Kent said "to Hershel!" Needless to say Dad took care of the rest with a little help from us, and the Ole Miss Rebels. 23-17 Rebs Win.