Thursday, January 31, 2019

An Unbelievable Buck

Yes, it's true. Paul Howell finally killed the big buck our whole camp has been trying to get for as long as I can remember. We were all so shook up that instead of envy that he expected, we all congratulated him and told him how proud we were of him. For once in his life he was actually humbled and for about three hours there he could hardly talk for the big grin on his face. WHAT A BUCK!! A massive and beautiful 10 point that WILL be gracing the living area of the Droptine Lodge.
After Paul wandered around for an hour or so shaking hands Over and Over again, I decided to finally get to the secret of how he managed to kill all these big deer. I grabbed a bottle of whiskey, led him off to a dark corner, had him tell his story (Over and Over again) and drink 'till he could not see, and then I bluntly asked him to tell me the true reason for his success.
I am going to give this information now to our good and faithful readers so you will know how to get a gigantic monster buck too and it is very simple and easy.
If you will go down to the Crossroads about Midnight on the darkest night, there is a (man) there next to a blackened stump with a feral grin that will ensure that you can get the big bucks too. All you have to do is sign your name at the bottom of the contract.

Monday, January 28, 2019

CAMO 1/25/2019- A Great Dog Has Left Us

Camo was raised as a circus dog and at an early age learned to walk the high wire, juggle, leap through flaming hoops, ride bareback, do flips, catch flaming arrows in his mouth and chase trespassers. She turned this down to come live with me and Denise and become best friends with Thunderhoof. She loved to go to camp. All you had to say was "Camp" or for me to pick up my rifle and bag and she was howling at the door ready to go.
She hated a big eared deer, a squirrel, wild hog, any big black bird (crow or buzzard), didn't like a chipmunk or rabbit and was not too fond of a grasshopper. She would kill a damn snake.
When she was young, she loved to run like the wind, but in later years she would ride in the buggy with us around the camp. Her best hunting trips were barking at deer through the windshield of my truck at deer as we rode around in my truck and growling at me to drive faster so she could grab one by the ears. She refused to do any of the tricks she knew, she was above all that, but she could bark, beg or sleep on command or not. She had us trained to get her treats with just one bark! 
Camo was the camp mascot and most of my best hunts were when she was at camp. When I got a big old deer she would race out to meet me and double check just to make sure the big horned varmint was dead. She loved almost everyone and was the smartest, most loving dog I have ever known.
At home she slept by Denise most nights, guarded our house against Big Foot, rhinoceroses, and burglars and was the child we didn't have. Also she was our best friend.
We buried her in the yard so we could look out and check on her occasionally, but I think she will spend her time sleeping by the fire and keeping an eye on us.
Denise and I are heart broken but have been truly blessed to have known such a noble companion and best friend. I really don't have the words to express how much I loved that  dog.

Tuesday, January 22, 2019

An Email From Captain Blood

These photos were supposedly taken Sunday at the famous Christmas Place and were emailed to me from someone named Captain Blood. There are no people in the photos and most of the camp members have already started screaming Fake News at the email, except from Smirking Paul Howell.
Supposedly this tiny 150 lb. deer had this large rack and was killed on the Spike Camp by the anonymous journalist/lawyer.
If you wish to respond to this prankster his email is

Friday, January 18, 2019

A Down Under Deer

Tricia Neagle got her firsr deer this past weekend. It was a very nice buck taken while hunting with The Flat Top Terror (Davin Lammey). She is from Australia and it goes to prove that since Davin killed a deer, the whole world has turned "Down Under" She is a very impressive woman.
She says it was a lot different from hunting a kangaroo, the deer was walking while a damn Roo just hops all over the place. Plus you usually just whack the kangaroo with a boomerang of course.  Congratulations to Tricia, a girl that seems to adjust to any challenge.
Someone ask her if I can at least borrow her boomerang.

Monday, January 14, 2019

Marian Gets Her Deer

It has been a while for Marian at the famous Christmas Place, but Marian finally got her deer. I took her to the Bird Point stand which she has never hunted. She hunted in a ground blind and the deer waltzed out in front of her late that afternoon. BLAM! The deer turned and basically jumped off a cliff into the deepest, darkest part of the property. Tim Crosby and I located the deer that night while Marian supervised from the edge of the cliff. I never want to go back down in that hole again, Poor Tim wanted me to shoot him.. She was happy as could be and the nice doe weighed 120 lbs. Another great weekend at the Christmas Place with Marian.
Rapelling classes start Feb 1st

Friday, January 11, 2019

Et Tu Davin

Davin Lammey killed a deer. This is a reason for much jubilation in the Lammey community as it was thought to be impossible. Never mind that he was drunk and asleep when the deer appeared and woke him up to commit suicide. He is now being called The Flat-Top Terror and woe to any deer that crosses his path. Congratulations Cousin!!!!
PS- This deer season is killing me and now my own cousin joins in.

Thursday, January 03, 2019

2019 Starts With A BOOM!!

Old White Beard (Paul Howell) started the New Year of 2019 off with a giant BOOM as he laid out this nice buck on New Years Day. This 210 lb. buck was taken at the Box Field where Paul has been hunting since August. About damn time. His wife and children celebrated because now they could finally have Christmas and open their presents.
Mr. Howell said "I love to kill a big deer and drive the members at the Christmas Place through the woods before me howling and screaming as I listen to the lamentations of their women"
PS- I am already tired of seeing this damn picture