A White-Eyed Panic

I totally understand. My brother, Satan (Paul), had been deluged with bucks all weekend. Trent and I had already taken big bucks and Paul was in a fever to get his. A deer would jump out. Too small, Another one would run by, How many horns did that SOB have? Back and forth for too days until Paul was completely white-eyed and feverish. He was talking to himself and bitching that the big ones were all dead. Trent and I laughed and laughed and laughed. Needless to say we did not rub salt in his wounds. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Finally, he could take it no more. A buck ran out, a 6 point, another one strolled by, too small. He had the safety off, sweating in the sub zero temperature. A deer ran by, Wait, He saw 5 points on one side. BOOM, BOOM!!! The deer went down.
Being the nice brother I am, I went to help him drag it out. I picked it up, slung it over my shoulder and carried it to the 4 wheeler, It was a little on the small side.
Good News, the people at Bass Pro said it was a world record as the smallest buck they had ever been asked to score. It only missed Boone and Crockett by 100 points.

The Voyage of the Wayward Whitetail

"Avast ye Lubbers, and harken to my tale of derring and bravery in a terrifying land of monsters and big bucks.
The Wayward Whitetail weighed anchor and sailed before the dawn through perilous shoals, and whirlpools guided by my intricate knowledge of the oceans and one candle. With one hand on the tiller and the other with a mug of Rum, I headed across an ocean of Typhoons, Hungry Water Gators,
and Piranha Carp to a terrifying land of Cyclops, Monsters and Giant Horned Bucks.
In a mighty battle with the Sinister Buck of Paul, I slew the beast using my wits, my trusty .270 Ruger and some nifty ninja moves I learned on the Internet. The beast is dead,  and I will return  for the King of the Monster Bucks once I give the evil Sorcerer, Paul the Pitiless, an autographed picture of my deer for Christmas.
The big 8 point weighed in at 210 lbs. with a 17 3/4 inch spread. Another great trip up the lake at the famous Christmas Place!

Good News For Water Valley

Maybe better, Great news for the citizens of Water Valley as they can now all rest peacefully in their beds at night. The news is that Judge Howell has finally killed a deer. This means that court will not be cancelled all winter again, it means that the criminals lurking in the dark will actually be locked up, and foreclosures on little old ladies with cats will decrease immensely. Thank God!!!
Trent shot this really nice buck near the Beaver Dam at the famous Christmas Place last Sunday morning. A 9-point weighing 200 lbs. Congratulations, Trent!
The down side is that now I will be expected to pay my rent all winter.

Selfies With Thunderhoof

That damn deer pesters me every time I go hunting, so I have decided to take a few selfies with him while I am out hunting this weekend. I just wish I could get his pic on the hanging pole or at least keep him from running all the deer off while I'm out there.. Stupid deer will not leave me alone.

The Big Bang

Deer season this year has been slow, and this past weekend was rain, rain and more rain. No one expected to do any good but gamely we went after the deer. The weather was so bad that just being huddled into a stand was all we could expect to survive, much less kill a big buck.
At 7 AM a BIG BANG rolled across the property and everyone knew exactly where it came from.
The infamous deer killer, Paul Howell, had struck again.
As the morning passed, more and more of the hunters straggled in wet to the bone, but no Paul.
Finally, he came in to camp. Wet, wild haired, wild eyed, exhausted and totally devastated he staggered into the camp house and told his story.
The big 10 pt was crossing in front of him about 80 yards through the woods and it was a last minute shot. Paul said he never got a good rest, and pulled the trigger anyway. He found a few drops of blood but the angry deer snorted at him when he went to go find the trophy and galloped off into parts unknown. Paul spent hours searching but no luck. Looks like that deer escaped the wrath of Paul to live another day.