A White-Eyed Panic

I totally understand. My brother, Satan (Paul), had been deluged with bucks all weekend. Trent and I had already taken big bucks and Paul was in a fever to get his. A deer would jump out. Too small, Another one would run by, How many horns did that SOB have? Back and forth for too days until Paul was completely white-eyed and feverish. He was talking to himself and bitching that the big ones were all dead. Trent and I laughed and laughed and laughed. Needless to say we did not rub salt in his wounds. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Finally, he could take it no more. A buck ran out, a 6 point, another one strolled by, too small. He had the safety off, sweating in the sub zero temperature. A deer ran by, Wait, He saw 5 points on one side. BOOM, BOOM!!! The deer went down.
Being the nice brother I am, I went to help him drag it out. I picked it up, slung it over my shoulder and carried it to the 4 wheeler, It was a little on the small side.
Good News, the people at Bass Pro said it was a world record as the smallest buck they had ever been asked to score. It only missed Boone and Crockett by 100 points.

The Voyage of the Wayward Whitetail

"Avast ye Lubbers, and harken to my tale of derring and bravery in a terrifying land of monsters and big bucks.
The Wayward Whitetail weighed anchor and sailed before the dawn through perilous shoals, and whirlpools guided by my intricate knowledge of the oceans and one candle. With one hand on the tiller and the other with a mug of Rum, I headed across an ocean of Typhoons, Hungry Water Gators,
and Piranha Carp to a terrifying land of Cyclops, Monsters and Giant Horned Bucks.
In a mighty battle with the Sinister Buck of Paul, I slew the beast using my wits, my trusty .270 Ruger and some nifty ninja moves I learned on the Internet. The beast is dead,  and I will return  for the King of the Monster Bucks once I give the evil Sorcerer, Paul the Pitiless, an autographed picture of my deer for Christmas.
The big 8 point weighed in at 210 lbs. with a 17 3/4 inch spread. Another great trip up the lake at the famous Christmas Place!

Good News For Water Valley

Maybe better, Great news for the citizens of Water Valley as they can now all rest peacefully in their beds at night. The news is that Judge Howell has finally killed a deer. This means that court will not be cancelled all winter again, it means that the criminals lurking in the dark will actually be locked up, and foreclosures on little old ladies with cats will decrease immensely. Thank God!!!
Trent shot this really nice buck near the Beaver Dam at the famous Christmas Place last Sunday morning. A 9-point weighing 200 lbs. Congratulations, Trent!
The down side is that now I will be expected to pay my rent all winter.

Selfies With Thunderhoof

That damn deer pesters me every time I go hunting, so I have decided to take a few selfies with him while I am out hunting this weekend. I just wish I could get his pic on the hanging pole or at least keep him from running all the deer off while I'm out there.. Stupid deer will not leave me alone.

The Big Bang

Deer season this year has been slow, and this past weekend was rain, rain and more rain. No one expected to do any good but gamely we went after the deer. The weather was so bad that just being huddled into a stand was all we could expect to survive, much less kill a big buck.
At 7 AM a BIG BANG rolled across the property and everyone knew exactly where it came from.
The infamous deer killer, Paul Howell, had struck again.
As the morning passed, more and more of the hunters straggled in wet to the bone, but no Paul.
Finally, he came in to camp. Wet, wild haired, wild eyed, exhausted and totally devastated he staggered into the camp house and told his story.
The big 10 pt was crossing in front of him about 80 yards through the woods and it was a last minute shot. Paul said he never got a good rest, and pulled the trigger anyway. He found a few drops of blood but the angry deer snorted at him when he went to go find the trophy and galloped off into parts unknown. Paul spent hours searching but no luck. Looks like that deer escaped the wrath of Paul to live another day.

Hog Eyes

I have seen it before and can now spot it a mile away. The haunted look, shaky hands, drool on the lips, low grunting and moaning and the eyes, yes, wild staring Hog Eyes. Yep, my brother James had HOG FEVER and my friend Phillip at The Hog Blog would have been proud. Mark Stewart stays that way all the time so it is easy to spot. SOB hates a damn hog and James is right in there with him.
I put him at the Beaverdam to hunt deer but he wanted to be close to the swamp in case he heard a hog. He did and snuck to the bottom of the hill eased into the brush and tried his newest contraption. Phillip would be so proud! A new game caller that works through your phone. He turned on the Hog Social Grunt call and a minute later he could see the cane parting as the big hog headed straight at him. At 10 yards it entered the tiny opening and he cut down on it with buckshot between the eyes!
The big hog weighed 230 lbs. A really big one. Congratulations James!

That's A Big Fat Zero!

Deer season with rifles opened this past weekend and the members at the famous Christmas Place notched a big fat Zero for the opening weekend. Paul said "It's Trent's fault for not getting the fields done in time." Trent said "It's Paul's fault for running the deer off with all his pals galloping around the woods last weekend." I said "Shoot me now"

Muzzle-Loader Success

The season started with a bang, or a boom as the members and guests at the famous Christmas Place started the year off right by taking 7 deer this past weekend.  We also put our best man (James Howell) in charge of eradicating the hog population but that went nowhere. No one at the camp minded since they were still drunk from watching the great Ole Miss-Texas A&M game.
final score Camp 7- OM-29 TAMU-28

2016- And So It Begins

The first weekend of the hunting season with muzzleloaders starts this weekend and everyone is headed to the famous Christmas Place as early as they can today. It has been quiet there and the deer we have seen are few and far between. No one has any idea what this season will bring. Our fields have suffered under a drought but recent rains should help revive them but it is a crap shoot this early. No matter, I promise we will all have a good time.

Lost In The Witch Cane

There is a wide ridge in the middle of our property thickly covered with Witch Cane.  Sometimes called Cane, Bamboo, Switch Cane, Owl Cane, etc. but down here they call it Witch Cane. However  you call it, through the middle of this cane thicket is a narrow track made by loggers 70-80 years ago that you can barely see, but if you follow it and get through to the other side, there is a little hidden valley that I discovered was filled with big buck sign. So yes, I took my climber in there after lunch and worked my way as quietly as I could through the thick cane, having to turn sideways and almost on my knee some of the way, but I made it through and set up my stand in a nice hickory tree and waited. That afternoon was bright and sunny and I saw deer after deer but not the big buck I wanted and after a great hunt, I got down out of my stand after dark and headed back.  I found my flashlight and turned it on. Now flashlights are not my specialty and they are supposed to work when you need them and worrying about batteries is not something you think about until you need them.  I turned it on and a feeble yellow glow was all the light I had.  I headed up into the Witch Cane.

I don’t know when I got off the trail but it was pretty quick, all I could see was the faint glow around me and the thick cane. The mistake I made was cutting back and forth trying to find the trail, and suddenly I was completely turned around. I’m carrying the climber on my back, sweating and a little panicky and I decided a straight line was best. I had to come out somewhere. The cane got thicker and thicker as I pushed my way through and suddenly I fell out into a small opening about 5 feet around. I was holding the small flashlight in my mouth so I could use my hands to fight my way, so I fell  almost to the ground and the dim light caught something right below me. Half covered in leaves and dirt was a broken tombstone. Everything went quiet like in a horror movie, and the moon suddenly rose giving a faint light. I brushed the dirt away in the dim light and could make out some faint writing inscribed. I brushed away more, then scraped the moss away with my knife. I could see the word in capital letters on the grave marker. W-I-T-C-H . Witch! I froze, but my mind was screaming at me to run, to get away. I stood up listening. No sound, no wind, nothing. It was deathly quiet.

Then a soft breeze touched the top of the cane, or maybe they moved themselves as it seemed a slight whisper went through them, a muttering stretching out as far as I could hear through the tops of the cane, then I heard it louder coming back, and a slight fog seemed to slowly start forming over the grave.

Unlike the horror movies, I did not wait any longer. I took off wide open, leaving my climber behind. I did not let up until I broke through the can a few hundred yards from my truck. I caught a breath, changed gears and made it to the truck in record time.

If you are looking for a great used climber, I can tell you where to get one free of charge, I’m sure it’s right where I left it.

Where's My Dog?

Gracie has been missing a week and Camo and I can't find that dog anywhere. She is a roamer and hasn't got a collar, but is as gentle and sweet a dog as I've ever seen.  Pit Bull.Lame in left rear leg from getting whacked by a car. If you see her please call me 662-473-7996.

No Squirrels For You

The squirrel hunt was a disaster. I should have known when I realized that Paul was in charge. The total killed was just enough for squirrel and dumplings. No one got the limit. The weather was pleasant but dry so we think the squirrels were all on vacation at the beach. Paul should know better that to organize a hunt during their vacation time.

It's Going to be A Squirrel Apocalypse

Careful, Careful !

Went to camp a week ago just to cut grass around the camp. Trent cuts a big swath through the front yard on the tractor and Burney sees something about 2 inches from the cut. A newborn fawn! In the front yard! Needless to say they did not cut near the baby deer but kept a close watch on it hoping the Mama would show up soon. Paul did make some noise about how it would taste like chicken until we sent him off to check stands. That evening the deer was still there but the next morning the Mom had come and they were gone.

Waiting For Global Cooling

Ready for winter, too bad the rest of you will freeze your fannies off.

Erin the Queen turns 19

August 6th is the date that the Queen bee turned 19. Happy Birthday Erin!

Carnival Update for 2016

Unfortunately I got side-tracked from Live Blogging the Carnival when the Swedish Bikini Team showed up and a Watermelon Fight broke out
. I am not going to elaborate.
At noon they had the weigh-in of the largest Watermelon. The expected winner at 617 lbs. was disqualified after Carnival officials agreed after much testing and repeated tastings that it was a rock painted green.
The winner was 198.4 lbs. shown here.

 

Denise checking out the giant watermelon

 

Gabriel, Mahala, Eleasah enjoying the Watermelons

 

 

Live Blogging Watermelon Carnival 2016

Once again the Bodock Times will be live Blogging the famous Watermelon Carnival of 2016, deep in the heart of the South, in Water Valley, MS.
The action is swift this morning as vendors rush to their sites to set up for the trampling herds of people expected to show up early to kick off the start of the Festival.
In front of my office at 109 NORTH COURT St a huge semi filled with watermelons has crashed into another 18 wheeler full of wild Russian hogs . The hogs are loose and eating the watermelons and chasing vendors and little old ladies around the park. Here come the Police in full riot gear. Trent and Paul are running around the park in front of the hogs handing out their business cards! Some old lady is whacking a hog with her purse! RUN FOR YOUR IVES! It is a grand and exciting day here in Water Valley. Come join the fun!!

Carnival Week- Finally

This week kicks of the Watermelon Carnival 2016 and to top it off the infamous Class of 1976 is having it's 40th year Reunion. Should be interesting as it has been a Long, Hot, Summer and I need to get past it and into the some deer news as soon as possible.
This week there will be plenty of Pre-Carnival activities to enjoy
1. Zika Run Challenge. The bug trucks will be in action this week rolling through town shooting out a mixture of smoke and DDT just like in the old days when we used to chase the truck as it rolled through our neighborhoods. The object is to chase it until you collapse. Last person standing wins. The bright side is you will not get the Zika virus.
2. Watermelon Stealing Workshop- This late night event usually has kids from 14-20 interested in breaking a few laws, having fun, being scared and stealing watermelons from our local producers. All contestants will wear dark clothing, carry bail money, and have insurance in case they get a rear end full of rock salt. Winner does not get caught and go to jail and have their Dad tear their butts up in front of the Sheriff.
3. Paul Howell Look Alike Contest- A Satanic look is what's required. Dress in your favorite Devil costume. The scarier you look the better. Prize is a $100 dollars (from Paul's cold clinging hands)
4. Get out of Jail Free Drawing. Tickets are 1.00 dollar. This prize will get you out of jail all winter as the Judge (Trent Howell) will be deer hunting and doesn't want any interruptions.

The Howell Open 2016

It was a scorcher as the Howell clan and friends gathered at the Water Valley Country Club for the 2016 Howell Open honoring Hershel and Jimmy Howell.
It was set up in teams for a 4 man scramble with Bebo in charge (who usually stacks his team), but this year they LET Betty Bullion win (again), her husband John played like a dog on another team which might have helped. My team came in second, and I know Paul cheated us out of winning though I am not sure how. His team came in LAST. Next year Aunt Marilyn said she would take his place if he couldn't play any better than that. Here is the winning team with the new trophy.
Ellis, Tom, Betty, Mike