We Lost Our Great Friend Bobby

This past weekend we lost our great cousin Bobby Howell, Burney's Dad. We had Thanksgiving Dinner and Friday had to go to Senatobia for the funeral. He had a great life as a trapper, hunter, fisherman and all around outdoorsman. He has been a staple with our camp for over 30 years and worked with me for several years at Howell Realty while we were changing over to Howell Realty and Appraisal.
 Everyone of us are going to miss him.
He was also very sociable and when I was actually killing deer he would always help me get it in. His idea was to go look at it, poke it with his cane, say :That's a good one" and get back in the truck while I busted a hernia getting the deer up to the tailgate. I am going to miss his quick wit and funny stories and the way he was always a major part of the Howell Deer Camp.
PS I bought that coat for him in the picture and think it was his favorite. Also we have not killed a damn buck yet!

The Island of Misfit Deer

This weekend I will start my annual trip to the Island of Misfit Deer. Going by boat, I will once again do my duty to check on these poor misshapen deer. The island is filled with big bucks with grotesque and gruesome antlers that I am sure no decent hunter would want adorning their walls. 27 pointer, double or triple drop tines, split brow tines, massive horns pointing in every direction,irregular horns so big that they can not be calculated by any known measurement. Somebody has to do this. Wish me Luck!

Opening Weekend Gun Season 2017

no deer, no hogs, no activity, no nothing

Introducing #42 Maralyn Bullion

This past weekend we celebrated my Aunt Maralyn Bullion's 95th birthday. It was a surprise party that did not surprise her but we had a great time. The secret she did not know was that she was going to be honored on the field during the OLE MISS game the next day.
James, Missy, Kent, Marijean, Denise, her daughter Alexis and boyfriend Curtis and myself are in the stands when Kent says "There she is out on the field" James says "I can't see her, what number is she wearing?" We decide it must be #42 cause she is a half back if I ever saw one. Unfortunately she did not get to play, but it was great to see her honored by OLE MISS on the field.

Brock Howell My Friend

I have waited 2 weeks to post this and it hurts too much to talk much about it, so I will keep this post short and when the time comes that I can write about fun times I will.
My nephew, my friend, my partner, my buddy has left us. He died in his sleep. He was 25 and worked with me here at HOWELL APPRAISAL. He was good, kind, conscientious, intelligent, very good at his job and a true friend. You don't get many like that in a lifetime. I will miss him always.
This is my most favorite picture. Having fun on Bourbon St after the Sugar Bowl.

Worlds Largest Squirrel Taken

Squirrel Camp was a blazing success this year at the famous Christmas Place. James Howell, bee profiteer, blasted this giant Squirrel, to take the world record on squirrels. There is a slight dispute as most of our so-called hunters were too drunk to say they actually examined the beast. Some of the others wouldn't know a squirrel from a porcupine, and others said it might be a wild hog, but they are not very reputable. So.. you heard it here first!

Squirrel Camp Jubilee!

This weekend is the Hershel Howell Memorial Squirrel Camp 2017. This means a little squirrel hunting and a lot of toasts and drinking around a campfire while celebrating life, my Dad, good times, and remembered fallen comrades along the way.
Plus there will be Squirrel and Dumplings Saturday Night. Yum! Yum!

Happy Birthday Silver Fox

Today is the Chief's birthday and even though he is not with us, our thoughts are with him. I am sure he is on a frosty ridge somewhere in heaven with his shotgun waiting on a big fat squirrel to show.
Then back to the camp where all his friends are hanging out before going to the golf course. 

Giant Rat Species Discovered in BUNK ROOM

Scientists and Ratologists today announced the discovery of a new giant rat species discovered in the Bunkroom at the famous Christmas Place. Dwellers in the hell hole said "We thought it was a deer, since we've never shot one." Burney Howell said "I never said anything because they sleep in my bed and keep me warm in the winter" The new species is expected to be named after Mr. Howell.
Burneykus-Infectivo-Ratilacious
https://www.seeker.com/earth/animals/a-giant-coconut-eating-giant-rat-was-discovered-in-the-solomon-islands
PS It would eat coconuts if we had any.

It's Not A 12 Point BUT.......Pretty Impressive

Congratulations ERIN  !!!!!

The Big Planting

Last weekend was the big planting camp at the famous Christmas Place. Trent, Paul, Burnet, Spencer, Terry Cutrair, Stewart Allen, our wonderful neighbor Paul Jones and me, your friendly neighborhood blogger were all in attendance.
The ground broke smoothly with a little hurricane water still keeping it wet and we poured on the seed and fertilizer. It was perfect. In fact we managed to work almost all day until Trent (as usual) tore up the disk and I came within a whisker of cutting my leg off with a chainsaw. No, I don't know how he did it either, but give him credit, we had to drag it in and use our little disk to finish with on Sunday.
We don't lack much and hope to have everything ready before squirrel camp in a couple of weeks.

Hurricane Denise

The hurricane started as just a small rain cloud several years ago. "It sure would be nice to go to the beach sometime," she said. Over time it started to form and get bigger into a Category 1 storm.
:"You know it sure would be nice to go to the beach. We need to go to the beach and relax in the sun and sand. I would really like to go on a vacation to the beach this year."
I said :I've got to go to the camp, maybe later"
As time went by the storm gathered, increased to a Category  2 and quickly a Category 3. "I want to go to the beach this summer. We need to go to the beach soon. We need a vacation to the beach.
I said, "Hey, I've got to go work at the camp. Maybe later.
Category 4 did not last long, It was steely eyes staring holes in me and slow repetitive sentences." I want to go to the beach this summer. I want to see the waves, smell the ocean, We need to go to the beach this summer.
"Honey, I need to go to camp"
Suddenly this year I was hit by a major Category 5 full raging deadly hurricane beyond my imagination. "I WANT TO GO TO THE BEACH, I WANT to go to the BEACH, WE ARE GOING TO THE BEACH, @#$##%#%$ BEACH YOU @#$@#$@%$#&*
The full force of Hurricane Denise was upon me.
"What about Hurricane Irma" I whimpered.
Her eyes turned red, lightning flashed from her eyes, tornados swept through the house, my dogs hid under the bed. They growled at me when I tried to get under there too.
Trent called "I need help at the camp"
I said " I am on my way to the beach!

We had a wonderful time at Orange Beach. Great weather, lots of sun, surf and food. Looking forward to going again. SOON!

A Very Strange Hog

Trent came back from camp last weekend and showed us this picture of the big hog he took over near the Pond Stand. Sitting on the stand, he saw the hog come up from the pond angling past him. He said it was completely covered in mud and the big boar was by itself. A good rest and BLAM! he got the hog. It weighed 250 lbs. and he was very eager to tell me the strange part. It had no testicles.. Yes, testicles,plus covered with huge cuts. Who would even shoot a poor crippled hog that was probably in a car wreck or been involved in unlawful hog experiments? Here's the pic, there are
no close-ups of the affected area.

Watermelon Carnival 2017

The annual Watermelon Carnival starts today and I am on my porch watching it unfold. This year the Longini Traveling Circus came marching down Main St at 10 o'clock and by some mix-up the Banner Militia band and drill Team was marching from the other direction. They met in front of the park with neither side giving an inch from their parade. 6 watermelon trucks WERE parked at the intersection as hostilities reached a peak. Two elephants are still missing from the circus, 2 watermelon covered blondes are missing from the band and 6 watermelon trucks are sitting empty from the fight.
IT WAS GREAT!
Tonight the usual suspects will gather here to reunite, drink and enjoy the Carnival and fireworks
Hope you can make it by to see us.

Howell 4th of July

This photo was taken before the GAMES BEGAN (of Course)
My Aunt Marilyn, age 95, once again won the Hatchet throw even though she now has to use two hands. In a surprise, Columbia Bullion won the Archery contest because basically she is the only one that didn't shoot their eye out. As you know the Golf had already been won by Me, Kent, Betty and Ellis, while Bebo won the ... hahahah he didn't win crap. John Bullion won the most improved on his golf game and southern lingo. Jim won the Person Most Likely to Leave Yankee Land and come home. Until next year!

The Howell Open 2017

The Howell Open Golf Tournament 2017 was
played this past weekend and against all odds and with much breaking of clubs, whining, crying, lying, cheating, gnashing of teeth, scurrilous rumors and outright Fake News from our so-called ingrate competitors. The team of Betty, Kent, Ellis and Rex (your humble correspondent) beat all those sore losers and won the HOWELL OPEN TROPHY!
PS- rumors of Russian collusion are False.

Another Red Letter Day....

Yes, another Red Letter Day for the old Howell Savings and Loan. My rental house out at the WV Boatlanding burned to the ground. I'm getting tired of winning.

The Confefe Meeting

This past weekend there was a big Confefe Meeting at the famous Christmas Place. Members were required to bring their Russian Handbooks and decoder rings. All of the bourgeois  members (Paul) were fined for not being there and new rules limiting hunting were imposed on the elites. (Paul) After a great meeting  and lots and lots of vodka, we managed to cut all the grass and clean the place up enough that it did not look abandoned anymore

Golfing For Hogs

The annual golf trip to the famous Christmas Place has changed over the last few years. Yes, people still golf but the desire to get after those hogs is larger than ever. Some golf, some hunt hogs, some do both at the same time (can't be too careful out there).
This past weekend, Robbie Parsons got this gigantic 240 lb. sow at the Pond Stand, I think with a 4-iron or a 30-06 I'm not sure which. In fact he managed to get two (some kind of birdie?)
Congratulations on a really nice hog!

Fishing With Thunderhoof

If you ever come to the famous Christmas Place to go fishing and we go out to get in the boat and that damn Thunderhoof shows up and wants to go, do yourself a favor and go on back to the camp.
He is the worst fishing companion ever. Almost every time I want to go, he shows up. Camo and I can't catch a fish to save our souls.
First of all a 500 lb deer should not be in a 12 foot aluminum boat. Just saying.
He always has his head in the tackle box, eats all the sandwiches, and for no reason at all, he will reach out and stick his head under the water just to look around.
Every now and then he will just jump out of the boat, splashing enough to drown you, then swim around the boat for awhile and then try to get back in.
 You are going to get wet, very wet.
He almost always gets the fishing line wrapped in his antlers and God help you if you actually catch a fish! He goes crazy!! Jumping around, dancing, trying to look at the fish, running back and forth in the boat, pawing at the fish, picking them up in his mouth and shaking them until you are covered in slobber, then he will jump out of the boat.
 You are going to get wet, very wet.