An Unbelievable Buck

Yes, it's true. Paul Howell finally killed the big buck our whole camp has been trying to get for as long as I can remember. We were all so shook up that instead of envy that he expected, we all congratulated him and told him how proud we were of him. For once in his life he was actually humbled and for about three hours there he could hardly talk for the big grin on his face. WHAT A BUCK!! A massive and beautiful 10 point that WILL be gracing the living area of the Droptine Lodge.
After Paul wandered around for an hour or so shaking hands Over and Over again, I decided to finally get to the secret of how he managed to kill all these big deer. I grabbed a bottle of whiskey, led him off to a dark corner, had him tell his story (Over and Over again) and drink 'till he could not see, and then I bluntly asked him to tell me the true reason for his success.
I am going to give this information now to our good and faithful readers so you will know how to get a gigantic monster buck too and it is very simple and easy.
If you will go down to the Crossroads about Midnight on the darkest night, there is a (man) there next to a blackened stump with a feral grin that will ensure that you can get the big bucks too. All you have to do is sign your name at the bottom of the contract.