Deer Camp Blog

Deer Camp Blog- the outdoor column of The Bodock Times- (a satirical periodical) Humor and Hunting at the famous Christmas Place Plantation Hunting Club on the edge of the Mississippi Delta


Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Othmars Dilemma

Ottawa, CAN> In a meeting room high atop the camouflage skyscraper that is home to Othmar Enterprises, a tense conference was in session. The board members sweated under the glare of the frosty eyes of their President, Othmar Vohringer as they went over the numbers from the previous year. To say the least, Othmar was not impressed.
Finally Othmar could take it no more and had Miss Lappadance remove herself from his lap and sent her to make him another martini. (shaken not stirred)
A wave of his hand stopped all chatter and he pointed at his director of advertising. “What do you mean, we are only getting 4 million hits a day on our website?”
“We have Twitter, Facebook, and everything else you can think of, What-Is-The- Problem?” he roared. No one moved or said a word as they hid behind their laptop computers.
“You!” he pointed again to the skinny man in glasses. “You are in charge of my advertising! We need a new plan. Do you have any new ideas?” he growled.
The room went deathly silent as the man sputtered and finally spoke up. “Uhhh..,How about a video to send to your readers that captures all of your greatest Deer Hunts?”
All breathing stopped in the room as Othmar mulled this over.
“Brilliant!”he exclaimed. “Brilliant Idea!” “Start on it immediately and give yourself a $2 raise”
Everyone in the room breathed a sigh of relief until a waving hand at the end of the big table caught Othmar’s eye. “Yes, Roberts. You have something you wish to add?” Othmars piercing eyes stared through the man as the room went deathly silent again.
“Uhh, Mr. Othmar, don’t you actually have to kill a deer first?”
Before anyone could react more than to draw in their breath,
Othmar reached down and pushed a red button, the floor opened and the seat that Roberts was in vanished through a hidden trap door in the floor. The terrible screams quickly died away as the smoking chair returned to it’s upright position and the trap door shut.
“Collins, Call Rex and book me a seat on a jet plane to Mississippi. Looks like I am going to start my video series at the famous Christmas Place.”


At 11:32 AM, Blogger The Hunter's Wife said...

That was funny!

At 4:22 PM, Blogger Othmar Vohringer said...

Very funny But the truth is that is exactly what happened last week. How do you know all the details of that meeting? Has somebody been talking again outside my office walls without my expressed permission and obtaining first a prepared manuscript?

PS: The reason for the absence of trophy pictures on my website and blogs is because I don't want it to be one of the many "look here what I've killed" websites. I see my website and blogs as service providers not as a place to show off.

And finally. Hunting at the famous Christmas Plantations is been on my priority list for a long time. As soon I can tear myself away here I'll do my best to get that priority checked off on my list.:)



At 9:55 PM, Blogger Editor said...

I am looking forward to your visit and appreciate your friendship

At 9:56 PM, Blogger Editor said...

PS bring Miss Lappadance with you!


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