Deer Camp Blog

Deer Camp Blog- the outdoor column of The Bodock Times- (a satirical periodical) Humor and Hunting at the famous Christmas Place Plantation Hunting Club on the edge of the Mississippi Delta

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Thursday, September 06, 2007

An Odorous Encounter

Most of my blogging has been about deer hunting, but we can also relish in the fact that we are somewhat gentleman farmers too. We were all happy and anxious to hook up and use the brand new bush-hog that My Dad purchased for the famous Christmas Place Hunting Club. It was a beauty with a 7 ft. cut and sparkling new as we went over to the barn that afternoon to hook it up to the old tractor we have had forever. I had a little fice dog named Scout then that went everywhere with me and she trotted at my heels as we went to admire our new equipment.
Things were going fine as Dad backed the tractor up and stopped, then got down to examine exactly how to hook it up. At that time, Scout gave a tremendous bark and dove through the little hole on the side of the bush hog and all hell broke loose under there. Barking, growling, hissing, bumping, yelping, and clawing noises came out from under the bush-hog. Trent and I got down to look in the hole like fools. That is when a horrible fog (I swear it was green) rolled out from underneath as I turned to yell at Dad. He was no fool, he had his 75 year old body stretched out like an Olympic sprinter in full stride running away from us as the skunk spray covered Trent and I. Oh, My, God! I felt like my tongue had been painted with it, my eyes were on fire and I was choking as I crawled backwards. Dad was 40 yards away laughing like a crazy person as Trent and I staggered up and tried to find fresh air.
Meanwhile Scout was still giving the skunk hell, but finally could not take it anymore and staggered out, fell over, grabbed a few mouthfuls of fresh air and dived back under the damn machine before we could grab her. The fight was back on. A minute later, we got ready to grab the fool dog and the damn skunk came out. We ran away! Quickly too!
The skunk grabbed some fresh air looked at us and dived back underneath. Dad was yelling instructions and sarcastic advice from 40 yards away but I think my ears were filled with skunk juice, because I could not hear him and couldn’t hardly see either. Round and round those two went, each one stopping for a breath of air every now and then while I mostly screamed obscenities at the dog and skunk through what I knew were green and blackened teeth.
Finally, thank God finally, Scout flopped out from under the bush-hog rolling and flopping on the ground and rubbing her eyes. I scooped her up, whereas she bit the hell out of me before she realized what was going on.
Dad would not let us or Scout back in the house. We stripped down in the yard while he tried to spray us down as we scrubbed ourselves and Scout with Lava soap and tomato juice. He burned our clothes right in front of us, brought out a few ragged pieces for us to put on, loaded up his stuff, got in his truck and left us there. Trent had come with him, but he sure wasn’t going back with him. We put everything away and came home. I drove home wearing a T-shirt and dirty underwear and they weren't even mine. It took two weeks at least before the smell got off of us. It took Scout three, and over a month before it was out of my truck. This was mine and Scouts’ first encounter with a skunk but not the last.

18 Comments:

At 11:59 AM, Blogger Kristine said...

Oh, that's just awful. I've never been sprayed by a skunk, but I imagine it's terrible.

I probably wouldn't have given you a ride home either.

 
At 12:45 PM, Blogger Callie said...

Holy Talledo Batman! THATS CLASSIC!! hehehehe... I have heard that being hit full on with a skunk- means endless hours dipped in tomato juice and that you have to burn your clothes or throw them away... WOW...what a powerful creature...But I laughed reading about it.

callie

 
At 12:54 PM, Anonymous Arthur said...

Now that is funny stuff. Thank god I have never had a close encounter with one before. Hopefully I never will.

 
At 12:58 PM, Anonymous Phillip said...

Funny stuff!

Had several close calls so far, but no catastrophes like yours. I've broken my lab from chasing small animals, mostly to prevent exactly this kind of incident from occurring.

However, our Sheltie simply refuses to learn.

 
At 1:07 PM, Blogger GUYK said...

BAWAHAHAHAHAHA

Just think what would have happened if you had notta had that couragous dawg..if ya had started that bush hawg a rollin' and the smell would have been scattered all over the famous Christmas Place grass..for months.

But what I really wanta know is what happened to that two toned kitty with the fluid drive?

 
At 1:23 PM, Blogger Hammer said...

Funny stuff!

I got it once about ten years ago. It took a week and lots of cologne.

 
At 2:06 PM, Blogger JDP said...

I would like to watch that on video!

JDP

 
At 2:48 PM, Blogger Andy said...

Oh what a mess! I hope I never tangle with one of those critters.

Phillip - I think it must be something built into the Shelties. Both of ours just love a good chase!

 
At 3:25 PM, Anonymous Bryan said...

At least you have some time for it to wear off prior to deer season!

 
At 3:48 PM, Blogger Editor said...

thanks everyone, looking back on it now, it is very funny.
GuyK the skunk got away, but I swear a few months later he was at my house in Water Valley where Scout and I had my next adventure with the damn varmint.

 
At 4:35 PM, Blogger GUYK said...

Rex, when I was a lad of 10 or 11 me and my dawg got tangled up with one. We got the damn skunk, skinned it out and brought the hide home and wuz in the process of salting it down behind the wash house when my Mom caught me..me and ole Roar, my Border Collie, had to sleep in the wash house for three nights..but the good thing wuz I didn't have to go to school for a week..they kept sending me home..

 
At 7:32 PM, Blogger Marian said...

That was so funny. I laughed so hard...I could just see it in my mind. You are a great storyteller Rex! :)

 
At 8:22 PM, Blogger ~Fathairybastard~ said...

Hilarious! When I was in college, I was a security guard at an oil company in Ft. Worth. One night, one of the guards was walking his rout through the place when he came around a corner outside and walked right into a skunk. He had to take a bath in tomatoo juice in one of the showers there that the oil field workers use, to get the stink off him. We razzed him for a long time, thanking God that it had been him, and not one of us. That guy went on to get a job at General Dynamics, working on computers. he was an ex-Marine chopper pilot, working there while he got a BS in computer science. Cool guy. Wonder where he and the other guys are now?

 
At 8:15 AM, Anonymous Michelle Rene said...

Wow, what a story! I have never been sprayed by a skunk, thank goodness but I remember when our dog got it once. OH the smell and wasted tomato jusice!

 
At 7:14 AM, Blogger deerslayer said...

Well now that's what I call real close encounters of the unwanted kind. Actually though you just lost some of the best scent blocker you could have gotten if only you'd have grabbed that ole skunk up by the tail and got his hine feet off the ground (as they can't spray then) you could have extracted the scent for future use while hunting and scouting deer. It's still funny just to think of you and Trent looking under that hogg and getting sprayed.

 
At 3:22 PM, Blogger Jon said...

Man, that is nasty! Sometimes, a young bird dog will point a skunk inadvertently and both he and the hunter (me) will get sprayed. I always carry a can of tomato or V-8 juice with me for "emergencies".

This just reminded me of a Skunk encounter I was involved in.

 
At 3:27 PM, Blogger Goon said...

So do you guys have a lot of Skunks down there? Skunks are a menace. For some reasons dog's like them though.

 
At 10:55 AM, Anonymous Old Scratch said...

Goon, I saw a bird dog stick his head in coon hole in SD once. I don't think that dog will ever make that mistake again. It took all of us to get that coon of that dog's head. By the way, coons in your parts are like twice as big as ours. Does the cold weather have something to do with it.

 

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