Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Smelly Revenge

I recently posted about my terrible meeting with a skunk in An Odorous Encounter. This was mine and my dog Scouts' first encounter, but not our last. Several months later we had just sat down to dinner at our home in Water Valley when I heard Scout start barking like crazy. Scout hates a possum and will not leave one alone in the yard. I figured after dinner I would run it off and put Scout in the house. The barking got closer to the back patio doors and suddenly a horrid smell crept across the table. "Skunk" I yelled, then "Run" as everyone broke for the back of the house. Scout was giving the damn skunk hell as they raced around the side of the house and I got out the door with a flashlight. Snapping the flashlight on reminded me that the batteries had not been changed since WWII. I found Scout raising hell with the skunk in the shrubbery. I put my feeble light on it and I swear to this day it was the same skunk. Vicious red eyes, black, white stripe, Evil. Yes! It was here for revenge! I backed up, got my truck and drove to the side of the house, shone my lights and then had a brilliant idea. Extension Cord!
I got the 100 foot cord and headed back. I figured I could use the end to flail at the dog and skunk until I could catch the dog and the skunk left. Scout was still barking like hell and skunk perfume wafted around me as I headed into the bushes.
Suddenly the skunk ran out! It ran right at me! I screamed like a girl! I raced down the hill, I untangled the extension cord that had wrapped around me from head to toe! I headed up cursing at both of them and whacking everything. Scout ran around the rear end of the house, the skunk ran around the front of the house. I stood there drowning in skunk smell. I headed to the front of the house dragging the extension cord and using my dim flashlight.
It was quiet around front as I eased up on the porch and checked everywhere for sign of the skunk. No sign. I eased to the end and looked in the big flowerbed full of azaleas and flowers. My light picked up no sign. Suddenly Scout rounded the corner and bounded into the flowerbed. I yelled at the dog, turned back cause I heard a noise, my dim light picked up nothing and then I glanced up. The skunk was on the window ledge not 2 feet from my face! I screamed like a girl! I dropped the light, which started spinning round and round like in a movie, ran, got tangled in the damn extension cord that managed to be wrapped around something else and when the slack ran out, I was laying flat on my back on the ground. That did it. I headed around to the back door to get my shotgun. Scout was standing at the door when I got there. Stupid damn dog! We spent most of the night in the bathtub.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

You're two for two on the funny skunk stories. That must have been quite a sight.

Anonymous said...

Man, I love these skunk stories. Had me laughing out loud again.

P.S. OPEN THE BOX!!! It's killing me. I have to know what is in there!

Marian Ann Love said...

Were you able to shoot the damn skunk? I hope so....love the part where you screamed like a girl and got all tangled up in the cord. You are hilarious! :)

Anonymous said...

Rex, you are a storyteller par excellence! I think the OBS needs to crown you Storyteller Laureate.

One of your best efforts so far!

GUYK said...

BAWAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Lesson learned..always get the sotgun first when you go out to see what the dawg is barkin' at..it might be a two toned kitty with a fluid drive and then it might be a two legged skunk

Anonymous said...

HEHehehe...

Buwahahahahah...

I think I wet my pants on that one from laughing...LOL

So- are you singing falsetto now with all that girl screaming???

Buwahahahaha

callie

Anonymous said...

I guess lightening does strike the same place twice...

(and I agree with Arthur...open the box!)

CDGardens said...

Brings back memories of our silly Cocker Spaniel Austi that had never experienced a skunk before...It was the fall after moving here to the timber. Had the skunk trapped under some brush. The dog wouldn't come when she was called.You got the picture. Stinky ever
after!
How long did it take for the smell to leave the house?

Editor said...

a month, Scout and I found ourselves as outcast for a long time.

JDP said...

Woulda thought you'd have learned the first go round not to tangle with a skunk!

JDP

Anon said...

I hope you shot that dog. I also hope you get skunked again. Skunks rule and you stink!