Deer Camp Blog- the outdoor column of The Bodock Times- (a satirical periodical) Humor and Hunting at the famous Christmas Place Plantation Hunting Club on the edge of the Mississippi Delta
Thursday, March 23, 2006
GOLF CAMP
Double Bogey, MS> Once again the time is getting near for Golf Camp at the famous Christmas Place Bogey Shooters Club.
Your host Trent Howell (18hcp) is sprucing up the camp and preparing his invite list.
The courses involved will be the Silver City links near Belzoni and the Benton Golf Links below Yazoo City.
Expected guest at this time:
1.Joe (Cliff Claven) Black- CPA, and undercover agent for the IRS. Like all CPA’s, his pencil has an eraser. Known as the only person to bore a golf ball to death with useless facts.
2. Trent (Hacker) Howell- Lawyer (which means he cheats), Known to choke a golf club to death over a bad shot.Recognized by bandages all over hands from useless Practice.
3. Greg ( Long Dong) Jones- Insurance Agent-yes, we know!- Known to hit 350 yards drives,unfortunately that is how far he hits his chip shots too. Known for passing out somewhere on back nine.
4.Mark (Shank) Stewart- Postal Worker- don’t piss him off, carries UZI in his golf bag. Known to shank a ball so bad it boomerangs.
5. Rex (Clank) Howell- Real Estate Agent-Yes, Snake, Crooked - Known to look good till he actually has to hit the ball, designated bogey specialist.
6. Barry (Nine) Weeks- Dentist and complainer has to be coaxed with beer and hotdogs to play more than 9 holes. Known to still have the first gold tooth he ever stole.
7. Paul (Go for It) Howell- another damn lawyer,they play golf in packs like wolves. Known to cheat, lie and steal, and don’t even get me started on his golf.
8. Hershel (Millionaire) Howell- Retired golf shark is known to have taken at least a million dollars off these idiots playing golf. Known for his latest ploy of wanting to play from short senior tees, and can still hit it farther than you.
Thursday Practice will be behind club house as we whack golf balls and try to run deer out of Hershels’ garden. A date is being decided, please contact T. Howell for more signup Info.
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